Among the Microserfs

Part of my job is covering Microsoft and it was time to go up and see them to chat and look at some new software. Sure, the third day on the job could be construed as hitting the ground running but there was a specific piece of software that needed reviewing and so I’ve come up to Seattle for two days of intensive briefings.

I can’t say about what we saw or met - even the choice of tea available must remain a closely guarded secret - because Microsoft made us all sign non-disclosure agreements (NDAs) that were so comprehensive we might as well have been gagged. Even internet access inside the briefing room was banned, leading to a roomful of hacks jonesing to check their inboxes on a work day. Those with personal modems shared their passwords and a practical working environment established.

Thankfully NDAs are less common than they were (and illegal in Germany I learned) but many companies still rely on them too much. Most are just agreements not to publish certain information before a set date, but some are byzantine legal documents that could be used to sue a company into the Stone Age. One friend in the business is still technically liable for prosecution if he breathes a word of one 1999 product launch.

That’s not the problem however – it’s the lack of trust. In my entire career I’ve never broken an embargo agreement and having to sign something like this is a company saying “We don’t trust you to be professional.” It didn’t help that the team opened the presentation by threatening “serious consequences” if we broke them. It put a very unpleasant spin on the morning, and I know I wasn’t alone in feeling this.

However, you couldn’t stay annoyed for long. The briefings (all nine hours of them on day one, with a prompt 8:30am start) were fascinating and the spokespeople generally made a genuine attempt to deal with questions, although obviously there’s some stuff that’s never going to get answered. There were a few fudges and slips, traditional at any demo, but overall it was a really interesting day, albeit with a few too many acronyms.

The other reason for the lifting of spirits was the weather. I have never visited Seattle and not been rained on, in nearly a decade of visits. This time around the air was balmy, the sun shining and all was well in the world. The Pacific Northwest is a beautiful, green landscape full of trees, distant mountains and postcard-quality waterfront. Even Microsoft’s sprawling campus is rather pretty – eschewing the dominating architecture of Oracle’s Borg-like complex or Facebook’s rather scruffy offices.

At the end of the day we all went out to dinner and ended up closing down the restaurant. That might sound impressive/worrying but people go to bed early here. The last call was 9:30pm, and the staff started flicking the lights half an hour later. God knows what Spanish or Italian visitors make of the place – 10pm is the pre-meal hour in those cultures. What on earth do people do here at night?